Source https://feeds.feedblitz.com/~/597160480/0/griswoldhomecare~Tabata-Training-For-Seniors-And-Elderly-Adults/
The science of fitness has grown enormously over the past two decades. We’ve learned how different fitness activities produce different results, how some forms of exercise are more efficient than others, and how the benefits of activity vary with age.
But some of the most important advancements in our understanding of fitness came from a Japanese researcher name Dr. Tabata. While studying the athlete routines of Olympic speed skaters, Dr. Tabata was among the first to recognize the special benefits of high intensity training.
What’s a Tabata Workout?
When comparing athletes who performed four minutes of high intensity exercise, and athletes who had performed an hour of moderate exercise, Dr. Tabata was surprised to discover short and intense exercise produced better results.
It wasn’t long before an exercise methodology began to develop around this discovery – the Tabata workout. The idea is simple. You’re supposed to perform high intensity exercise for 20 seconds, rest for 10 seconds, and then begin your next repetition. The exercise can be almost anything, and the benefits of Tabata can be spectacular.
Tabata Health Benefits
Though it didn’t have a name when Dr. Tabata discovered it, the Tabata workout method is now considered a form of high intensity interval training. And HIIT has been intensively studied in the time since Dr. Tabata initially made his discovery.
HIIT and Tabata benefits include rapidly improve glucose metabolism for people with diabetes, slow down the progression of Parkinson’s, and even offer improved memory. High intensity exercises are more effective at accelerating metabolism, much makes them burn fat faster, and makes finding the best Tabata exercises for weight loss quite easy.
Tabata Training for Seniors
Unfortunately, many forms of Tabata are unapproachable for seniors because high intensity interval training often involves high-impact exercises which are stressful to joints. Fortunately, there are still a number of Tabata exercises for seniors which can provide all the same Tabata workout benefits outlined above.
Modified Pushups
It might be surprising, but due to their high intensity, pushups are actually among the best Tabata workouts. Though most people know what a pushup looks like, it’s important to know about proper form to minimize the chance of injury.
Begin in the plank position with your hands positioned apart from each other, slightly wider than shoulder width. To help moderate intensity, seniors may move their knees to the floor, ideally on a padded surface.
Whether balanced on knees or toes, continue to use your abdominal muscles to keep straight a neutral body posture. Elbows should remain close to the body. From the starting position, gradually lower your chest until it’s nearly touching the floor, then return to the top by pushing upward.
Russian Twist
Because the Russian Twist is performed on the floor, padding may be necessary. But the padding should remain relatively thin, similar to a yoga mat, since balance is a large part of this exercise. Sitting with feet together and knees bent, lean your torso backwards to balance. Lean so that, relative to the floor, your back is at a 45-degree angle.
With hands clasped together, and using abdominal muscles to maintain balance, move your clasped hands to your right side, and then to your left side. This involves a slight twisting motion in the upper body, but avoid placing pressure on the lower back.
Plank with a Row
This starting position is similar to a pushup, except each arm should be fully extended. From here, raise your left hand off the floor, and bring it to your left side. Do this while keeping your ribs and elbow in alignment, then repeat for the other side. As long as you don’t allow your hips to drop from the starting position, you can increase speed of this exercise as much as necessary to find the right intensity.
Making Your Own
Best of all, you can make your own Tabata exercises. The Tabata method allows you to do basically anything that will get your heart rate up, provided you can continue to do it for about 20 seconds. Though you should always understand the proper form of an athletic motion before undertaking it, to reduce the risk of injury.
Staying Safe
For seniors and elderly adults who already have a moderate level of fitness, and who have been guided to exert themselves with minimal chance of injury, Tabata can be a great addition to an active lifestyle. But before you undertake high intensity interval workouts like Tabata, you should always take a couple of minutes to warmup. Additionally, it’s always a good idea to talk to your doctor before leaping into a new exercise regimen.
Source https://feeds.feedblitz.com/~/597160480/0/griswoldhomecare~Tabata-Training-For-Seniors-And-Elderly-Adults/
The science of fitness has grown enormously over the past two decades. We’ve learned how different fitness activities produce different results, how some forms of exercise are more efficient than others, and how the benefits of activity vary with age.
But some of the most important advancements in our understanding of fitness came from a Japanese researcher name Dr. Tabata. While studying the athlete routines of Olympic speed skaters, Dr. Tabata was among the first to recognize the special benefits of high intensity training.
What’s a Tabata Workout?
When comparing athletes who performed four minutes of high intensity exercise, and athletes who had performed an hour of moderate exercise, Dr. Tabata was surprised to discover short and intense exercise produced better results.
It wasn’t long before an exercise methodology began to develop around this discovery – the Tabata workout. The idea is simple. You’re supposed to perform high intensity exercise for 20 seconds, rest for 10 seconds, and then begin your next repetition. The exercise can be almost anything, and the benefits of Tabata can be spectacular.
Tabata Health Benefits
Though it didn’t have a name when Dr. Tabata discovered it, the Tabata workout method is now considered a form of high intensity interval training. And HIIT has been intensively studied in the time since Dr. Tabata initially made his discovery.
HIIT and Tabata benefits include rapidly improve glucose metabolism for people with diabetes, slow down the progression of Parkinson’s, and even offer improved memory. High intensity exercises are more effective at accelerating metabolism, much makes them burn fat faster, and makes finding the best Tabata exercises for weight loss quite easy.
Tabata Training for Seniors
Unfortunately, many forms of Tabata are unapproachable for seniors because high intensity interval training often involves high-impact exercises which are stressful to joints. Fortunately, there are still a number of Tabata exercises for seniors which can provide all the same Tabata workout benefits outlined above.
Modified Pushups
It might be surprising, but due to their high intensity, pushups are actually among the best Tabata workouts. Though most people know what a pushup looks like, it’s important to know about proper form to minimize the chance of injury.
Begin in the plank position with your hands positioned apart from each other, slightly wider than shoulder width. To help moderate intensity, seniors may move their knees to the floor, ideally on a padded surface.
Whether balanced on knees or toes, continue to use your abdominal muscles to keep straight a neutral body posture. Elbows should remain close to the body. From the starting position, gradually lower your chest until it’s nearly touching the floor, then return to the top by pushing upward.
Russian Twist
Because the Russian Twist is performed on the floor, padding may be necessary. But the padding should remain relatively thin, similar to a yoga mat, since balance is a large part of this exercise. Sitting with feet together and knees bent, lean your torso backwards to balance. Lean so that, relative to the floor, your back is at a 45-degree angle.
With hands clasped together, and using abdominal muscles to maintain balance, move your clasped hands to your right side, and then to your left side. This involves a slight twisting motion in the upper body, but avoid placing pressure on the lower back.
Plank with a Row
This starting position is similar to a pushup, except each arm should be fully extended. From here, raise your left hand off the floor, and bring it to your left side. Do this while keeping your ribs and elbow in alignment, then repeat for the other side. As long as you don’t allow your hips to drop from the starting position, you can increase speed of this exercise as much as necessary to find the right intensity.
Making Your Own
Best of all, you can make your own Tabata exercises. The Tabata method allows you to do basically anything that will get your heart rate up, provided you can continue to do it for about 20 seconds. Though you should always understand the proper form of an athletic motion before undertaking it, to reduce the risk of injury.
Staying Safe
For seniors and elderly adults who already have a moderate level of fitness, and who have been guided to exert themselves with minimal chance of injury, Tabata can be a great addition to an active lifestyle. But before you undertake high intensity interval workouts like Tabata, you should always take a couple of minutes to warmup. Additionally, it’s always a good idea to talk to your doctor before leaping into a new exercise regimen.
Source http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NoMeatAthlete/~3/nyEDkg4h7wQ/
There’s nothing like a new pair of running kicks.
They look crisp, smell fresh, and — if you’re anything like me — instantly add a little extra pep to your stride.
I’ll even go as far as to say that it’s a sure bet that my first run in a new pair of shoes will be a good one.
But after that freshness wears off, after the smell turns sour and you’re left with just the miles on your training plan, what makes one running shoe better than any other?
Walk through a specialty running store and you’ll see dozens of brands and models to choose from, each with a different set of features that look and sound like the next best thing…
…New performance foams, shoe shapes, spring boards, and random other made-up-word materials, all promising to help you run faster or prevent your next injury.
So how do you decide?
As a long-time ultrarunner and regular shoe reviewer for sites like Competitor, I find myself trying out a new pair of shoes almost every month, and I’ve come to realize fancy marketing words have very little to do with a shoe’s performance.
While it might feel overwhelming in the store, finding the right shoe for you is not as complicated as you might think.
Below I share my tips for how to choose the perfect shoe to carry any plant-based athlete through their training and across the finish line.
What Vegans Should Know About Running Shoes
When it comes to running shoes for vegans, there’s good news and there’s bad news:
The good news is that in order to keep a shoe light and breathable, leather and other animal fibers are very rarely used. You can generally assume that the shoe materials are vegan.
The problem area for vegans comes from the glue that holds it all together, which is sometimes produced from animal bones. Worse, because many shoes are produced at multiple factories — upper made in China, sole in Thailand, and assembled in the US, for example — different glues can be used at different phases of the assembly process, and some shoe makers aren’t sure if all the glues are made from synthetic products.
If you want your shoe to be 100% vegan, then you’ll need to do some research ahead of time. Some brands have released blanket statements about their shoes, while others will label some as vegan and others not.
Certain online retailers like REI and Zappos do the research for you and allow you to sort by vegan shoes. Or you can often find out through quick Google searches and learn what other runners have shared.
When in doubt, contact support for the particular shoe company and see what they have to say.
Do you Need a Road Shoe or a Trail Shoe?
Trail running has exploded in popularity over the past several years, and with it, an influx of trail specific shoes.
Trail shoes are designed to protect your foot against more rugged terrain and grip the dirt, mud, or rock better than a road shoe.
So do you need a road shoe or a trail shoe?
Let’s get one thing clear, you can absolutely run roads in a trail shoe and trails in a road shoe. While they may not be as efficient or effective on the opposite surface, oftentimes you’ll notice little to no difference in good conditions.
That’s why I recommend you choose a shoe for the surface you run most often. For example, I probably run 65-70% of my miles on trail, therefore I typically invest in trail running shoes and use them for nearly all runs, even ones on the road.
But if you only hop on the trail every once in a while, stick with a road shoe, since that’s where you log most of your time.
Injury Prevention: Heel to Toe Drop and Cushion
In preparation for this article, I asked a buddy who works at a local running store what the #1 question he gets from people looking for new shoes. He said that hands down, the top question is some version of:
“Do I want a minimalist shoe or one with a bunch of cushion?”
People read a certain book or hear from a running friend that this type of shoe design is the only way to stay injury free.
But the truth is, everyone is different. So the first step is to decide what’s right for you and your style of running.
To better help you understand that, let’s start by looking at a few of the common terms:
Cushion
Everyone knows a heavily cushioned shoe when they see one, but how do you know what’s best for you?
These days the same company will often create a very minimalist, low profile shoe with little cushioning, as well as a heavily cushioned shoe with a massive stack height. Here’s an example of two very differently cushioned shoes:
A low profile, minimalist style of shoe:
- Allows for more ground feel, something that many runners find particularly helpful on the trail.
- Is said to naturally shift your running stride to one where you land on your midfoot instead of your heel.
A heavily, or max, cushioned shoe on the other hand:
- Absorbs a substantial amount of impact, which in turn can help with aches and pains during longer runs and races.
- Feels super soft and comfortable on your foot.
- Can help make recovery runs feel easier on the body.
Both, and everything in between, can serve a purpose for the right runner.
Heel to Toe Drop
Heel to toe drop is the difference in height between the heel and the forefoot.
For example, a shoe may have a 16mm stack height at the heel, but only an 9mm stack height at the forefoot. Therefore the heel to toe drop would be 7mm.
For a long time, it was very common for running shoes to have a significant heel to toe drop because it was believed that the extra padding in the heel took away some of the impact of your landing.
Now, many runners believe that too much heel to toe drop will encourage bad running form and may actually cause more injuries because of the strong heel strike.
In response, companies have begun to offer shoes with little to no heel to toe drop that are believed to naturally encourage you to land more on the midfoot (because there’s no extra padding to disguise a heel strike) and improve running form.
That being said, the heel to toe drop is still very much a thing, and many of the top selling brands and shoes still have a large drop. (For example, Nike’s infamous VaporFly 4% has an 11mm heel to toe drop.)
How Do Each of These Prevent Injury?
Well, it depends on who you ask. But here are a few things I believe to be true:
- A shoe with a large heel to toe drop will encourage you to heel strike more than is healthy, and will likely leave you more vulnerable to injuries.
- If you’re switching from a shoe with a large heel to toe drop into one with a zero or low drop, take your time. Easing in to those switches will reduce your risk of injury.
- Higher cushioned shoes can reduce impact on certain joints (which is a good thing), but can also allow for your form to get sloppy without you naturally feeling the breakdown.
- Low cushioned shoes will give your foot more of a beating, but over time it will strengthen the foot and ankle muscles.
- Mixing up the type and style of shoe you run in helps strengthen different muscles, improve your stride, and help prevent repetitive strain.
So now you know what some of the options are going to be when you get to the running store.
But what does that actually look like when you walk into a running store?
The Real Question to Ask Yourself when Buying a Shoe
All these lead me to the real question every runner should ask themselves when buying a shoe.
The only question that truly matters:
How does the shoe feel on my foot?
It doesn’t matter what brand your favorite runner sports, or which marketing ploy caught your attention, the only thing that matters about a shoe is how it feels on your feet when you’re running.
- Does it lock your heel in place and offer the right amount room in the mid and forefoot?
- Does the amount of forward rock and ground connection fit your style?
- When you jog, how does the level of cushion feel with your stride?
I’m drawn to shoes with little to no heel to toe drop (6mm or less), which I’ve found encourages my best running form. But when it comes to cushion, I mix it up regularly. I love a shoe with minimal cushion for better ground feel on technical trails, and more cushion when I’m logging long miles on the road.
But I’m just one, non-elite runner. You’re your own runner with your own unique stride, injury history, and goals.
That’s why running specialty shops will almost always let you run in a shoe before you buy it — likely either on a treadmill or around the block.
The next time you’re in the market for a new pair of running shoes, come prepared to try on a variety of shoes, and maybe even get in a quick jog.
Because with the right pair of shoes, that new shoe feeling may never go away.
The post The No Meat Athlete Guide to Buying Your Perfect Running Shoe (and the Only Question that Really Matters) appeared first on No Meat Athlete.
Source http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NoMeatAthlete/~3/nyEDkg4h7wQ/
There’s nothing like a new pair of running kicks.
They look crisp, smell fresh, and — if you’re anything like me — instantly add a little extra pep to your stride.
I’ll even go as far as to say that it’s a sure bet that my first run in a new pair of shoes will be a good one.
But after that freshness wears off, after the smell turns sour and you’re left with just the miles on your training plan, what makes one running shoe better than any other?
Walk through a specialty running store and you’ll see dozens of brands and models to choose from, each with a different set of features that look and sound like the next best thing…
…New performance foams, shoe shapes, spring boards, and random other made-up-word materials, all promising to help you run faster or prevent your next injury.
So how do you decide?
As a long-time ultrarunner and regular shoe reviewer for sites like Competitor, I find myself trying out a new pair of shoes almost every month, and I’ve come to realize fancy marketing words have very little to do with a shoe’s performance.
While it might feel overwhelming in the store, finding the right shoe for you is not as complicated as you might think.
Below I share my tips for how to choose the perfect shoe to carry any plant-based athlete through their training and across the finish line.
What Vegans Should Know About Running Shoes
When it comes to running shoes for vegans, there’s good news and there’s bad news:
The good news is that in order to keep a shoe light and breathable, leather and other animal fibers are very rarely used. You can generally assume that the shoe materials are vegan.
The problem area for vegans comes from the glue that holds it all together, which is sometimes produced from animal bones. Worse, because many shoes are produced at multiple factories — upper made in China, sole in Thailand, and assembled in the US, for example — different glues can be used at different phases of the assembly process, and some shoe makers aren’t sure if all the glues are made from synthetic products.
If you want your shoe to be 100% vegan, then you’ll need to do some research ahead of time. Some brands have released blanket statements about their shoes, while others will label some as vegan and others not.
Certain online retailers like REI and Zappos do the research for you and allow you to sort by vegan shoes. Or you can often find out through quick Google searches and learn what other runners have shared.
When in doubt, contact support for the particular shoe company and see what they have to say.
Do you Need a Road Shoe or a Trail Shoe?
Trail running has exploded in popularity over the past several years, and with it, an influx of trail specific shoes.
Trail shoes are designed to protect your foot against more rugged terrain and grip the dirt, mud, or rock better than a road shoe.
So do you need a road shoe or a trail shoe?
Let’s get one thing clear, you can absolutely run roads in a trail shoe and trails in a road shoe. While they may not be as efficient or effective on the opposite surface, oftentimes you’ll notice little to no difference in good conditions.
That’s why I recommend you choose a shoe for the surface you run most often. For example, I probably run 65-70% of my miles on trail, therefore I typically invest in trail running shoes and use them for nearly all runs, even ones on the road.
But if you only hop on the trail every once in a while, stick with a road shoe, since that’s where you log most of your time.
Injury Prevention: Heel to Toe Drop and Cushion
In preparation for this article, I asked a buddy who works at a local running store what the #1 question he gets from people looking for new shoes. He said that hands down, the top question is some version of:
“Do I want a minimalist shoe or one with a bunch of cushion?”
People read a certain book or hear from a running friend that this type of shoe design is the only way to stay injury free.
But the truth is, everyone is different. So the first step is to decide what’s right for you and your style of running.
To better help you understand that, let’s start by looking at a few of the common terms:
Cushion
Everyone knows a heavily cushioned shoe when they see one, but how do you know what’s best for you?
These days the same company will often create a very minimalist, low profile shoe with little cushioning, as well as a heavily cushioned shoe with a massive stack height. Here’s an example of two very differently cushioned shoes:
A low profile, minimalist style of shoe:
- Allows for more ground feel, something that many runners find particularly helpful on the trail.
- Is said to naturally shift your running stride to one where you land on your midfoot instead of your heel.
A heavily, or max, cushioned shoe on the other hand:
- Absorbs a substantial amount of impact, which in turn can help with aches and pains during longer runs and races.
- Feels super soft and comfortable on your foot.
- Can help make recovery runs feel easier on the body.
Both, and everything in between, can serve a purpose for the right runner.
Heel to Toe Drop
Heel to toe drop is the difference in height between the heel and the forefoot.
For example, a shoe may have a 16mm stack height at the heel, but only an 9mm stack height at the forefoot. Therefore the heel to toe drop would be 7mm.
For a long time, it was very common for running shoes to have a significant heel to toe drop because it was believed that the extra padding in the heel took away some of the impact of your landing.
Now, many runners believe that too much heel to toe drop will encourage bad running form and may actually cause more injuries because of the strong heel strike.
In response, companies have begun to offer shoes with little to no heel to toe drop that are believed to naturally encourage you to land more on the midfoot (because there’s no extra padding to disguise a heel strike) and improve running form.
That being said, the heel to toe drop is still very much a thing, and many of the top selling brands and shoes still have a large drop. (For example, Nike’s infamous VaporFly 4% has an 11mm heel to toe drop.)
How Do Each of These Prevent Injury?
Well, it depends on who you ask. But here are a few things I believe to be true:
- A shoe with a large heel to toe drop will encourage you to heel strike more than is healthy, and will likely leave you more vulnerable to injuries.
- If you’re switching from a shoe with a large heel to toe drop into one with a zero or low drop, take your time. Easing in to those switches will reduce your risk of injury.
- Higher cushioned shoes can reduce impact on certain joints (which is a good thing), but can also allow for your form to get sloppy without you naturally feeling the breakdown.
- Low cushioned shoes will give your foot more of a beating, but over time it will strengthen the foot and ankle muscles.
- Mixing up the type and style of shoe you run in helps strengthen different muscles, improve your stride, and help prevent repetitive strain.
So now you know what some of the options are going to be when you get to the running store.
But what does that actually look like when you walk into a running store?
The Real Question to Ask Yourself when Buying a Shoe
All these lead me to the real question every runner should ask themselves when buying a shoe.
The only question that truly matters:
How does the shoe feel on my foot?
It doesn’t matter what brand your favorite runner sports, or which marketing ploy caught your attention, the only thing that matters about a shoe is how it feels on your feet when you’re running.
- Does it lock your heel in place and offer the right amount room in the mid and forefoot?
- Does the amount of forward rock and ground connection fit your style?
- When you jog, how does the level of cushion feel with your stride?
I’m drawn to shoes with little to no heel to toe drop (6mm or less), which I’ve found encourages my best running form. But when it comes to cushion, I mix it up regularly. I love a shoe with minimal cushion for better ground feel on technical trails, and more cushion when I’m logging long miles on the road.
But I’m just one, non-elite runner. You’re your own runner with your own unique stride, injury history, and goals.
That’s why running specialty shops will almost always let you run in a shoe before you buy it — likely either on a treadmill or around the block.
The next time you’re in the market for a new pair of running shoes, come prepared to try on a variety of shoes, and maybe even get in a quick jog.
Because with the right pair of shoes, that new shoe feeling may never go away.
The post The No Meat Athlete Guide to Buying Your Perfect Running Shoe (and the Only Question that Really Matters) appeared first on No Meat Athlete.
Source http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/tinybuddha/~3/LJV6_qB-mGc/
“When you say ‘yes’ to others, make sure you’re not saying ‘no’ to yourself.” ~Paulo Coelho
People-pleasers regularly subvert their own needs for the needs of others. We spend years saying “yes” when we mean “no,” signing up for commitments we’d rather avoid, and occupying our minds with others’ desires.
When we finally clear out the clutter to put ourselves first, we look around at the empty space, bewildered, with endless questions. What do we want? What does true happiness look like for us? What would a life lived on our own terms be like?
For me, these questions once provoked anxiety. I’d spent a lifetime catering to my parents, friends, colleagues, and lovers—anyone but myself. By asking what I really wanted, I was looking my fear straight in the eye: my fear of being responsible for my own happiness. My fear of not getting what I wish for.
These fears are both potent and entirely surmountable—if we’re brave enough to connect with our innermost desires.
When we’re strongly connected to our dreams and desires, we begin to set boundaries with other people so we can reach them, and we slowly start finding the confidence to speak our truth. Our dreams and desires remind us how communicating authentically will change our lives, and the lives of our loved ones, for the better.
For this reason, we recovering people-pleasers need to reclaim our familiarity with our inner voice and innermost needs. We cannot communicate authentically with others if we can’t communicate authentically with our inner selves.
In my journey to overcome people pleasing, I’ve learned a few helpful tricks to connect with my innermost self and uncover what I really want in all areas of my life. Perhaps one (or more) of these methods may help you do the same.
1. Label your feelings.
As I mention in my post on setting boundaries, many of us have become so attuned to the feelings of others that our own feelings are elusive strangers, entirely unrecognizable to us.
Our feelings are critical guideposts as we learn to prioritize our own needs—if we’re able to identify and own them. We can rebuild our connection to our feelings by noticing their presence in our bodies and hearts.
First, we must learn to give ourselves permission to be excited, inspired, and desirous. I often notice these feelings when they appear as fluttering in my chest or tingling down my spine. These feelings signal that I’m moving toward something that excites me.
If, like me, you’ve spent a lifetime motivated by guilt and anxiety, your positive emotions can starkly illuminate the activities and relationships that bring you pure joy.
We can also learn from feelings that are challenging or unpleasant, once we’re able to identify them. Instead of glossing over anxiety, overwhelm, and anger, we can notice these feelings as pits in our stomachs, pressure in our chests, and tightness in our throats. Those feelings might be signals that something isn’t right for us, or that we need to set boundaries with others.
2. Leave the system.
Sometimes our deepest desires are buried under layers of fear, particularly the fear of seeming selfish or the fear of disappointing others. One way to dig beneath the fear is to mentally remove ourselves from the systems of which we’re a part.
Begin by considering one of your social systems: your romantic relationship, your workplace, your church, your family. Then, ask yourself: “What would I do differently if I weren’t a part of this system?”
Previously unacknowledged desires emerge when you extricate yourself from the pressures and influences of your system.
Years ago, when I first did this exercise, I wrote in my journal, “What would I do differently if I weren’t in a relationship with my partner?” I was amazed as my hand flew across the page, scribbling: “Sign up for a dance class! Go out with friends more! Sleep in on Sundays!”
My answers helped me realize that I was suffocating my own desires out of fear of my partner’s reactions. What I really wanted was right there on the page. Having this list enabled me to consider how I might carve out more space for my own desires within my relationship.
3. Make a wish.
The first time I saw a life coach, she began our session with the simplest of questions: “If you were granted three wishes, what would you wish for?”
At first I thought her question was contrived, but when I answered, two of my responses were illuminating: I wished for a healthier relationship with my family, and I wished to become fully self-employed in the career of my dreams.
Then she looked me in the eye: “You want these two things very much?”
I nodded.
“More than anything else in the world?”
I nodded again.
She grinned. “Then what have you been waiting for?”
I was speechless. I’d never given myself permission to suspend reality, if only for a moment, to dream big. Making a wish allowed me to dive into my dreams without stopping myself with “What if?”s “How?”s and “I could never do that.” Once I spoke my desires aloud, I could no longer ignore their truth. I begin strategizing how to get there.
Practice suspending reality to discover what you crave. Imagine that you could make a wish that would be instantly granted, or imagine that you could walk through a door and your ideal life waited on the other side. What do you notice about these dreams? What desires do they demonstrate?
4. Weave a web of impact.
One of people-pleasers’ greatest challenges is the fear of being perceived as selfish or uncaring. I know this was true for me. Many of us believe that our worth comes from meeting others’ needs. Sometimes we forget that speaking our truth positively impacts other people.
Take a moment to ask yourself the question: “If I spoke my truth and set firm boundaries, who else would benefit, and how?” Consider your partner, your friends, your colleagues, your children, passersby on the street. Consider who you might serve as a role model. Who might benefit from witnessing your strength and independence?
You will quickly realize that speaking your truth has far-reaching benefits. Keep your list visible to remind yourself of the web of impact your new habits will have.
5. Start small.
If you’ve been in a habit of people-pleasing for a long time, it may be challenging to immediately identify your own big dreams. You may feel that you truly don’t know what you want right now, and that is totally normal. Living your truth and communicating authentically are muscles; when you exercise them regularly, they become stronger over time.
Give yourself permission to start small. For example, you might not yet know what you want out of your career, but you do know you love strolling around the lake in the morning and winding down your nights with chamomile tea. You may not yet know which city you want to relocate to, but you do know you’d like to take a mid-afternoon power nap and buy thermal socks.
These wants are sacred whispers from your innermost self. Give your innermost self time to surface. By pursuing these small desires, you learn to trust yourself. You begin to realize that you are fully capable of being your own advocate and building the life you want.
Pay special attention to how it feels to meet your needs. Be patient. With the passage of time, bigger dreams make themselves known in your heart.
Authentic communication is a two-way street; we must speak truthfully to ourselves before we can speak truthfully to others. Once we become familiar with what we really want, we can imagine a world where we replace old habits, like people-pleasing, with new visions for a brighter future.
Hailey Magee is a certified authentic communication coach who helps women set clear boundaries and speak their truth in relationship. She envisions a world where women feel empowered to dream big, speak boldly, and live radiantly. She is now accepting new clients. You can follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and visit her website, www.haileymagee.com.
Get in the conversation! Click here to leave a comment on the site.
The post How Recovering People-Pleasers Can Discover What They Really Want appeared first on Tiny Buddha.
Source http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/tinybuddha/~3/LJV6_qB-mGc/
“When you say ‘yes’ to others, make sure you’re not saying ‘no’ to yourself.” ~Paulo Coelho
People-pleasers regularly subvert their own needs for the needs of others. We spend years saying “yes” when we mean “no,” signing up for commitments we’d rather avoid, and occupying our minds with others’ desires.
When we finally clear out the clutter to put ourselves first, we look around at the empty space, bewildered, with endless questions. What do we want? What does true happiness look like for us? What would a life lived on our own terms be like?
For me, these questions once provoked anxiety. I’d spent a lifetime catering to my parents, friends, colleagues, and lovers—anyone but myself. By asking what I really wanted, I was looking my fear straight in the eye: my fear of being responsible for my own happiness. My fear of not getting what I wish for.
These fears are both potent and entirely surmountable—if we’re brave enough to connect with our innermost desires.
When we’re strongly connected to our dreams and desires, we begin to set boundaries with other people so we can reach them, and we slowly start finding the confidence to speak our truth. Our dreams and desires remind us how communicating authentically will change our lives, and the lives of our loved ones, for the better.
For this reason, we recovering people-pleasers need to reclaim our familiarity with our inner voice and innermost needs. We cannot communicate authentically with others if we can’t communicate authentically with our inner selves.
In my journey to overcome people pleasing, I’ve learned a few helpful tricks to connect with my innermost self and uncover what I really want in all areas of my life. Perhaps one (or more) of these methods may help you do the same.
1. Label your feelings.
As I mention in my post on setting boundaries, many of us have become so attuned to the feelings of others that our own feelings are elusive strangers, entirely unrecognizable to us.
Our feelings are critical guideposts as we learn to prioritize our own needs—if we’re able to identify and own them. We can rebuild our connection to our feelings by noticing their presence in our bodies and hearts.
First, we must learn to give ourselves permission to be excited, inspired, and desirous. I often notice these feelings when they appear as fluttering in my chest or tingling down my spine. These feelings signal that I’m moving toward something that excites me.
If, like me, you’ve spent a lifetime motivated by guilt and anxiety, your positive emotions can starkly illuminate the activities and relationships that bring you pure joy.
We can also learn from feelings that are challenging or unpleasant, once we’re able to identify them. Instead of glossing over anxiety, overwhelm, and anger, we can notice these feelings as pits in our stomachs, pressure in our chests, and tightness in our throats. Those feelings might be signals that something isn’t right for us, or that we need to set boundaries with others.
2. Leave the system.
Sometimes our deepest desires are buried under layers of fear, particularly the fear of seeming selfish or the fear of disappointing others. One way to dig beneath the fear is to mentally remove ourselves from the systems of which we’re a part.
Begin by considering one of your social systems: your romantic relationship, your workplace, your church, your family. Then, ask yourself: “What would I do differently if I weren’t a part of this system?”
Previously unacknowledged desires emerge when you extricate yourself from the pressures and influences of your system.
Years ago, when I first did this exercise, I wrote in my journal, “What would I do differently if I weren’t in a relationship with my partner?” I was amazed as my hand flew across the page, scribbling: “Sign up for a dance class! Go out with friends more! Sleep in on Sundays!”
My answers helped me realize that I was suffocating my own desires out of fear of my partner’s reactions. What I really wanted was right there on the page. Having this list enabled me to consider how I might carve out more space for my own desires within my relationship.
3. Make a wish.
The first time I saw a life coach, she began our session with the simplest of questions: “If you were granted three wishes, what would you wish for?”
At first I thought her question was contrived, but when I answered, two of my responses were illuminating: I wished for a healthier relationship with my family, and I wished to become fully self-employed in the career of my dreams.
Then she looked me in the eye: “You want these two things very much?”
I nodded.
“More than anything else in the world?”
I nodded again.
She grinned. “Then what have you been waiting for?”
I was speechless. I’d never given myself permission to suspend reality, if only for a moment, to dream big. Making a wish allowed me to dive into my dreams without stopping myself with “What if?”s “How?”s and “I could never do that.” Once I spoke my desires aloud, I could no longer ignore their truth. I begin strategizing how to get there.
Practice suspending reality to discover what you crave. Imagine that you could make a wish that would be instantly granted, or imagine that you could walk through a door and your ideal life waited on the other side. What do you notice about these dreams? What desires do they demonstrate?
4. Weave a web of impact.
One of people-pleasers’ greatest challenges is the fear of being perceived as selfish or uncaring. I know this was true for me. Many of us believe that our worth comes from meeting others’ needs. Sometimes we forget that speaking our truth positively impacts other people.
Take a moment to ask yourself the question: “If I spoke my truth and set firm boundaries, who else would benefit, and how?” Consider your partner, your friends, your colleagues, your children, passersby on the street. Consider who you might serve as a role model. Who might benefit from witnessing your strength and independence?
You will quickly realize that speaking your truth has far-reaching benefits. Keep your list visible to remind yourself of the web of impact your new habits will have.
5. Start small.
If you’ve been in a habit of people-pleasing for a long time, it may be challenging to immediately identify your own big dreams. You may feel that you truly don’t know what you want right now, and that is totally normal. Living your truth and communicating authentically are muscles; when you exercise them regularly, they become stronger over time.
Give yourself permission to start small. For example, you might not yet know what you want out of your career, but you do know you love strolling around the lake in the morning and winding down your nights with chamomile tea. You may not yet know which city you want to relocate to, but you do know you’d like to take a mid-afternoon power nap and buy thermal socks.
These wants are sacred whispers from your innermost self. Give your innermost self time to surface. By pursuing these small desires, you learn to trust yourself. You begin to realize that you are fully capable of being your own advocate and building the life you want.
Pay special attention to how it feels to meet your needs. Be patient. With the passage of time, bigger dreams make themselves known in your heart.
Authentic communication is a two-way street; we must speak truthfully to ourselves before we can speak truthfully to others. Once we become familiar with what we really want, we can imagine a world where we replace old habits, like people-pleasing, with new visions for a brighter future.
Hailey Magee is a certified authentic communication coach who helps women set clear boundaries and speak their truth in relationship. She envisions a world where women feel empowered to dream big, speak boldly, and live radiantly. She is now accepting new clients. You can follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and visit her website, www.haileymagee.com.
Get in the conversation! Click here to leave a comment on the site.
The post How Recovering People-Pleasers Can Discover What They Really Want appeared first on Tiny Buddha.
Source https://greatist.com/live/judging-other-people-workout?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=feed_https–greatistcom–
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Weight: 218 pounds
Weight Lost in 2 Weeks: 1 pound
Total Lost: 35 pounds
Any time I go into a gym or a new exercise class, I’m nervous: Will I be able to do the workout? Are people looking at me because I’m fat? Are they looking at me while I’m unable to do the workout? Why am I sweating so much? Can they see that I’m sweating? Seriously, it seems medically impossible that I produce this much sweat. All of that and a litany of other low self-esteem thoughts cross my mind before my workout is done.
I used to think that all of these other judgmental people in the gym were the problem. But that’s not the case.
I Will Beat That Skinny Bitch
About six years ago, I took tough boot camp classes 4-5 times a week. Though I was about 30 pounds lighter than I am today, I was not in great shape and was always one of the biggest girls in the class. But I worked hard and felt happy every time I got through the hour without nearly passing out and praying for death.
After attending this class for about six months, the gym had a big open house, so a bunch of new people showed up to get their butts kicked on a Saturday morning. And one girl immediately became my enemy.
This tiny, beautiful redhead waltzed into class without a care in the world. She tugged at her adorable knee-high socks and perfectly plaited braids as she began her personal warm-up in the middle of the room. To me, her warm-up seemed to serve two purposes: prepare her muscles for exercise and constantly draw attention to how much cuter she was than everyone else. Each hamstring stretch cried out, “Why, yes, I look this good. How do I do it?” She seemed completely at ease. And that infuriated me.
“I will beat you, Little Red,” I vowed. “Even if I have to die during this workout, I will destroy you.”
To be clear, there was no competition. It wasn’t like Flywheel, where everyone kept score, and the winning name came up in lights for everyone to see. There were no points. There was certainly no “winner.” But in my mind, this 105-pound 25-year-old thought she could breeze through this workout, while my 190-pound body would suffer. I wanted to prove that I could do every push-up, battle rope, and jump squat right along with her. Of course, this person never said anything to me and probably didn’t even know I was there. But I was set: I would beat this skinny bitch.
As we began, Little Red seemed confident, but it didn’t last. We did burpees into jumping jacks into high knees then back into burpees. Then came the deadlifts and wall sits and sprints across the floor. And slowly but surely, all of Red’s cocky confidence slipped away. She was sweating. She was having a hard time. And my fat self was gliding through. Okay, maybe not gliding—I was suffering just as much as anyone—but I did it with a smile, thrilled by the fact that I could keep up with the tiny newcomer.
By the end of the class, Red slumped to the floor. Class had clearly been harder than she’d expected, and she was happy to be done. And me? Sure, I was covered in sweat, my face was the color of a cooked lobster, and I had to do the push-ups on my knees. But I was victorious.
Little Red came back the next week, looking like a woman heading into battle—she knew it was going to be hard. After that painful session, she never came back. I, on the other hand, kept going for another six months.
Judgment Day
At the time, I felt triumphant: I’d overcome a judgmental, skinny lady and showed that a big girl can do anything a tiny girl can. Hooray for me! But now I can see that this is a perfect example of how exceptionally judgmental I can be.
Did Little Red do anything to me? No. Did she say something mean to me? No. Did she give me a weird look? No! Yes, this girl showed up with a bit of a cocky attitude, but I had no reason to make her my gym enemy. Because she was so skinny, I assumed she thought I was gross, which made me assume she was a bitch, which, in turn, led me to concoct an entire competition out of thin air.
And I still do this all the time! Way too often, I think, Ugh, that skinny bitch, why is she even here, when I go to a gym. No wonder I assume that everybody I work out with is judging me since I’m sitting in the corner judging everyone in the room.
In the past few months, I’ve really tried to work on my negative self-talk. Now, I need to work on my negative other-people talk. Just this week, I saw a picture of the manager at a gym I’m going to join and thought, She’s so skinny and pretty, she probably won’t get me. What the hell is that?
I need to get over these snap judgments because they feed my self-consciousness. The cycle goes like this: I think bad things about strangers, so I assume they’re thinking bad about me, so I act weird to them, which makes them act weird to me, which proves to me that they were jerks all along, so I go on judging them.
This week, I’ll be going to the gym regularly again, and the term “skinny bitch” is getting erased from my vocabulary. Maybe if I go in with a positive attitude and the idea that every person there is just a decent human trying to get into shape, I won’t end up in a self-conscious spiral. Maybe the impossible will happen: I’ll make friends with the skinny girls and complete one not-on-my-knees push-up.
… don’t hold your breath for the push-up.
Amber Petty is an L.A.-based writer and a regular contributor to Greatist. Follow along as she shares her weight-loss journey in her new bi-monthly column, Slim Chance. Take singing lessons from her via Sing a Different Tune and follow her on Instagram @ambernpetty.
Source https://greatist.com/live/judging-other-people-workout?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=feed_https–greatistcom–
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Weight: 218 pounds
Weight Lost in 2 Weeks: 1 pound
Total Lost: 35 pounds
Any time I go into a gym or a new exercise class, I’m nervous: Will I be able to do the workout? Are people looking at me because I’m fat? Are they looking at me while I’m unable to do the workout? Why am I sweating so much? Can they see that I’m sweating? Seriously, it seems medically impossible that I produce this much sweat. All of that and a litany of other low self-esteem thoughts cross my mind before my workout is done.
I used to think that all of these other judgmental people in the gym were the problem. But that’s not the case.
I Will Beat That Skinny Bitch
About six years ago, I took tough boot camp classes 4-5 times a week. Though I was about 30 pounds lighter than I am today, I was not in great shape and was always one of the biggest girls in the class. But I worked hard and felt happy every time I got through the hour without nearly passing out and praying for death.
After attending this class for about six months, the gym had a big open house, so a bunch of new people showed up to get their butts kicked on a Saturday morning. And one girl immediately became my enemy.
This tiny, beautiful redhead waltzed into class without a care in the world. She tugged at her adorable knee-high socks and perfectly plaited braids as she began her personal warm-up in the middle of the room. To me, her warm-up seemed to serve two purposes: prepare her muscles for exercise and constantly draw attention to how much cuter she was than everyone else. Each hamstring stretch cried out, “Why, yes, I look this good. How do I do it?” She seemed completely at ease. And that infuriated me.
“I will beat you, Little Red,” I vowed. “Even if I have to die during this workout, I will destroy you.”
To be clear, there was no competition. It wasn’t like Flywheel, where everyone kept score, and the winning name came up in lights for everyone to see. There were no points. There was certainly no “winner.” But in my mind, this 105-pound 25-year-old thought she could breeze through this workout, while my 190-pound body would suffer. I wanted to prove that I could do every push-up, battle rope, and jump squat right along with her. Of course, this person never said anything to me and probably didn’t even know I was there. But I was set: I would beat this skinny bitch.
As we began, Little Red seemed confident, but it didn’t last. We did burpees into jumping jacks into high knees then back into burpees. Then came the deadlifts and wall sits and sprints across the floor. And slowly but surely, all of Red’s cocky confidence slipped away. She was sweating. She was having a hard time. And my fat self was gliding through. Okay, maybe not gliding—I was suffering just as much as anyone—but I did it with a smile, thrilled by the fact that I could keep up with the tiny newcomer.
By the end of the class, Red slumped to the floor. Class had clearly been harder than she’d expected, and she was happy to be done. And me? Sure, I was covered in sweat, my face was the color of a cooked lobster, and I had to do the push-ups on my knees. But I was victorious.
Little Red came back the next week, looking like a woman heading into battle—she knew it was going to be hard. After that painful session, she never came back. I, on the other hand, kept going for another six months.
Judgment Day
At the time, I felt triumphant: I’d overcome a judgmental, skinny lady and showed that a big girl can do anything a tiny girl can. Hooray for me! But now I can see that this is a perfect example of how exceptionally judgmental I can be.
Did Little Red do anything to me? No. Did she say something mean to me? No. Did she give me a weird look? No! Yes, this girl showed up with a bit of a cocky attitude, but I had no reason to make her my gym enemy. Because she was so skinny, I assumed she thought I was gross, which made me assume she was a bitch, which, in turn, led me to concoct an entire competition out of thin air.
And I still do this all the time! Way too often, I think, Ugh, that skinny bitch, why is she even here, when I go to a gym. No wonder I assume that everybody I work out with is judging me since I’m sitting in the corner judging everyone in the room.
In the past few months, I’ve really tried to work on my negative self-talk. Now, I need to work on my negative other-people talk. Just this week, I saw a picture of the manager at a gym I’m going to join and thought, She’s so skinny and pretty, she probably won’t get me. What the hell is that?
I need to get over these snap judgments because they feed my self-consciousness. The cycle goes like this: I think bad things about strangers, so I assume they’re thinking bad about me, so I act weird to them, which makes them act weird to me, which proves to me that they were jerks all along, so I go on judging them.
This week, I’ll be going to the gym regularly again, and the term “skinny bitch” is getting erased from my vocabulary. Maybe if I go in with a positive attitude and the idea that every person there is just a decent human trying to get into shape, I won’t end up in a self-conscious spiral. Maybe the impossible will happen: I’ll make friends with the skinny girls and complete one not-on-my-knees push-up.
… don’t hold your breath for the push-up.
Amber Petty is an L.A.-based writer and a regular contributor to Greatist. Follow along as she shares her weight-loss journey in her new bi-monthly column, Slim Chance. Take singing lessons from her via Sing a Different Tune and follow her on Instagram @ambernpetty.
